【雅思写作】如何攻克雅思写作衔接的难题？

2016-08-30 15:30

来源：

作者：

摘要：广州新东方学校 22年专注教育培训，校区遍布广州各区，课程涵盖出国留学、英语学习、考研辅导、中学辅导、小学辅导、小语种等，是一所综合性教育培训学校。所有课程均可网报，更多优惠可咨询电话：400-020-9198

当前所在位置：广州新东方学校>>>出国留学>>>英联邦>>>雅思（IELTS）

点击查看>>>2016年雅思（IELTS）备考特辑

很多同学在攻克了词汇语法以及审题难关后，雅思写作还是5-5.5分，很大一部分原因是由于“Coherence and Cohesion(衔接和连贯)”的掌握欠佳。花了大量的时间去记忆类似于consequently, admittedly的关联词，恨不得每一句前面都加一个自己觉得合适的连接词。然而有新东方老师指出这种做法并不符合评分标准，会被定义为过度使用衔接成分。

下面我们一起来看看剑桥雅思试题9的一篇考官范文，看看“连贯和衔接”的使用。

题目：

Some people say that the best way to improve public health is by increasing the number of sports facilities. Others, however, say that this would have little effect on public health and other measures are required.

Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

A problem of modern societies is the declining level of health in the general population, with conflicting views on how to tackle this worrying trend.

通过代词this的使用使得“现象”与大众对现象的看法产生了衔接，清晰简洁，不留痕迹做到了评分准则中的“uses cohesion in such a way that it attracts no attention”

Onepossible solution is to provide more sports facilities to encourage a more lifestyle.

通过 “one possible”写出了后文还会提到提到其他的解决方案，从而体现了后文在分段和内容上与总观点的对应，即评分准则中的”skilfully manages paragraphing“

Advocates ofthis believe that today’s sedentary lifestyle and stressful working

通过this的使用把主体段与“首段”紧密联系起来

conditions mean that physical activity is no longer part of either our work or our leisure time. If there were easy-to-reach local sports centres, we would be more

通过对于关键词的修饰进一步论证了论点中涉及的关键重心内容，体现了内容的深化，论据与观点的衔接(即增多“sports facilities”的第一个原因：需要让大众更方便做运动)

likely to make exercise a regular part of our lives, rather than just collapsing in front of a screen every evening. The variety of sports that could be offered would

作用同上“通过对于关键词的修饰进一步论证了论点中涉及的关键重心内容，体现了内容的深化，论据与观点的衔接”(即增多“sports facilities”的第二个原因：需要满足更多人的需求)，两个原因之间并没有生硬的使用“Firstly, Secondly”

cater for all ages, levels of fitness and interests: those with painful memories of PE at school might be happier in the swimming pool than on the football pitch.

However, there may be better ways of tackling this problem. Interest in sport is

通过代词”this ”的使用，是的此段观点与题目相联系(即在此段会写出“other possible ways”),并且与上一段形成并列关系

not universal, and additional facilities might simply attract the already fit, not those who most need them. Physical activity could be encouraged relatively cheaply, for example by installing exercise equipment in parks, as my local council has done. This has the added benefit that parents and children often use them

“This”代替前面的措施，前后句之间因此产生紧密联系

together just for fun, which develops a positive attitude to exercise at an early age.

“which”代替前面所描述的“增加equipment”的直接影响，使主句和从句，直接影响和间接影响产生联系

As well as physical activity, high tax penalties could be imposed on high-fat food products, tobacco and alcohol, as excessive consumption of any of these

(普通连接词“as”后接原因) (“these”代词的使用加强主从句之间的联系)

contributes to poor health. Even improving public transport would help: it takes longer to walk to the bus stop than to the car.

In my opinion, focusing on sports facilities is too narrow an approach and would not have the desired results. People should be encouraged not only to be more physically active but also to adopt a healthier lifestyle in general.

通过以上的分析可以看出，考官是极少使用明显生硬的连接词的，而是通过紧扣论点的论据分类，代词的准确应用以及论点与分论点的内容呼应达到“不留痕迹，分段得体”的状态的。同学们要做到“连贯与衔接”的完美展现，新东方老师建议大家掌握 “代词”的灵活应用和内容的彼此联系才是真谛。

了解更多雅思资讯>>>雅思（IELTS）

推荐阅读

新东方广州学校官方咨询微信：小小新：（微信号：gzxdfsc）

了解更多优惠活动、课程安排，欢迎添加我们的微信号【gzxdfsc】，
这里将随时有顾问提供专业课程咨询和优惠发送，感谢您对新东方的支持。

焦点推荐

版权及免责声明

① 凡本网注明"稿件来源：新东方"的所有文字、图片和音视频稿件，版权均属新东方教育科技集团（含本网和新东方网）所有，任何媒体、网站或个人未经本网协议授权不得转载、链接、转贴或以其他任何方式复制、发表。已经本网协议授权的媒体、网站，在下载使用时必须注明"稿件来源：新东方"，违者本网将依法追究法律责任。

② 本网未注明"稿件来源：新东方"的文/图等稿件均为转载稿，本网转载仅基于传递更多信息之目的，并不意味着赞同转载稿的观点或证实其内容的真实性。如其他媒体、网站或个人从本网下载使用，必须保留本网注明的"稿件来源"，并自负版权等法律责任。如擅自篡改为"稿件来源：新东方"，本网将依法追究法律责任。

③ 如本网转载稿涉及版权等问题，请作者见稿后在两周内速来电与新东方网联系，电话：010-60908555。